Doomed If I Do, Doomed If I Don't

So, one day I'm at the Doc's office getting a 'script for Gout meds and he's like, "Do you know you have high blood pressure??". And I reply that ever since I can remember it's been running at around 130/90, even when I was young and in shape in boot camp, why?? And he informs me that it's now around 180/110. And I reply Holy Shit!!

Having a family history of heart disease AND stroke, I figure that I oughta do something help keep my ticker from going on strike or winding up with baked taters for brains. So he proceded to put me on Lisinopril to get it under control. And after a couple of months, it's down to around 125/85. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!

Fast forward to today. While watching Fox News today, I catch a glimpse of the word "Lisinopril" go by on the news crawler at the bottom of the screen. So I sit and wait for two commercial cycles to catch it again and see what's up. I finally see it again and find out it's possibly connected to 21 deaths. Once again, HOLY SHIT!! But I missed where the story comes from, so I cruise on over to the Fox News site and do a search and find this:

Medication Possible Factor in 21 Deaths

Monday, October 09, 2006

PANAMA CITY, Panama — Panamanian authorities say they suspect a medicine taken to treat high blood pressure may be among the factors leading to the deaths of 21 people since July who have succumbed to a mysterious illness that triggers kidney failure.

The 21st victim died either late Sunday or early Monday morning, said Panamanian public health official Rosario Turner said Monday. She did not specify the exact hour of death, or the age or gender of the patient, but said officials would release more details later.

On Friday, Panama's health minister stopped sales of the medication, Lisinopril Normon, and began removing it from pharmacy shelves. About 9,000 Panamanians take the medicine.

Authorities said they did not believe the medication had been tampered with.

The drug's Spanish manufacturer, generic drug maker Normon SA, issued a statement denying that its medicine was the cause and adding that there have been no problems in other countries where it is sold.

The illness thus far mostly has affected people older than 60. Other symptoms of the illness include vomiting, diarrhea and fever.

Well, lemme see here Monty...
Door #1 - Heart Attack...
Door #2 - Stroke...
Door #3 - Kidney Failure... Can I go for what's in the box??

The up side is that I know Panama City ain't in the most civilized part of the world. It sits in middle of a friggin' jungle in which you can find hundreds of diseases that also have vomiting, diarrhea and fever as some of their symptoms, and that's just the ones we KNOW of.

The down side is that I know that cruel bitch Fate will piss in my Capt. Crunch whenever she gets a chance. I don't recall signing a release form giving nature the rights to make my ass old, this is bullshit and I want my money back.